I have wanted to be a Mommy my entire life. I always planned on staying home with my children, but one thing led to another and I spent my first six years of motherhood working 50+ hours a week in a job I loved but funnelled far too much energy into. Maybe that time spent running in five different directions is what makes me so appreciative of the opportunity I have now to focus on my boys. In any case, I love being home with my kids. I have absolutely no desire to ever return to full time employment nor can I imagine ever sending my kids away to a full-time school. I don't pretend that being a stay at home mom is easy, but it drives me absolutely nuts to scan my facebook feed and see moms complaining about being home with their kids... There isn't anywhere else I would rather be. Here's why:
1. Our days have a rhythm... not a schedule or a to-do list.
I have spent years battling with "schedules." I hate them with a burning passion because what is scheduled never seems to fit with my current mood. However, I spent years coordinating my work schedule with my husband's, arranging school schedules, childcare schedules, rehearsal schedules, gym schedules, and on and on. I kept FIVE color-coded calendars via my Google account and I sent weekly messages to the team of relatives that it took to keep my family functioning and my children cared for. I will forever be grateful to them for keeping my children out of day care and in loving, one on one family situations, but I do not miss coordinating the chaos at all! This time last year, I set an alarm for 6:30 five or six days a week in order to get dressed and made up, forcibly wake up, dress, and feed both kids and then drop each off at a different location before going to work myself. Now, I set an alarm for 8:00 three days a week just to make sure we are all up in time to throw on some clothes and drive the Munchkin to school. I never have to stress out about what child is going where with whom. That alone has reduced my stress level 93%!!! My kids have never really had schedules, either, but we are all learning the benefits of a gentle routine.
2. I know my children better than anyone else does.
That sounds selfish, right? You know what? I don't care. I'm their Mommy and I get to be special. ;-) In all seriousness, though, I really enjoy the fact that for the first time, I spend more meaningful awake hours with my kids than their teachers, friends, or other relatives do. We are building a foundation that I hope provides support for a loving, respectful relationship for years to come. On a side note, because of his awesome nurse's schedule, Daddy easily takes #2 in this category.
3. My children have a relationship with each other.
My kids are almost five years apart. If I was working full time and Munchkin was in a traditional school, they would spend 8-10 hours a day, five days a week in completely separate locations. In fact, Aedan's biggest complaint in the one semester he did go to school full time was "I miss my brother." Now, the boys spend 15 hours a week apart, max. It shows. They adore one another and have a deeper relationship than I would have ever imagined possible with the age difference. Again, I feel like they are building an important foundation for future years.
4. We have time to investigate seasons, holidays, and thematic units we all enjoy.
I love planning... parties, curriculum, vacations... whatever. Homeschooling is the ultimate planning challenge. Almost everything we do is thematic. In October, we explored pumpkins, candy corn, and bats. In November, we will be studying the Wampanoags, the Pilgrims, and Thanksgiving (culminating with a visit to Plymouth)! In December, we will explore holidays celebrating light around the world. Munchkin has recently discovered the library and loves hunting for books each week that fit with our theme. He also frequently requests to pursue topics on his own as well. Recently we have been reading about the Big Bang and learning basic words in Italian by his request. Although he is more than on-track with his grade level (I make a point of referring back to the Common Core Curriculum to check in every couple of months), I think Munchkin gets more out of this style of education (along with his three days a week in school of course!) than he would at a traditional public or private school. By not focusing on standards, achievements, or even assessments of any kind, learning is still an adventure!
5. My children's instincts, needs, and desires are respected.
More important than the lack of standards and testing, I value homeschooling (from infancy on up) because it personalizes the educational experience (and simply the day to day living experience) for my kids. As any teacher will tell you, every decision in a classroom has to be made based on what works best for the majority. So schedules, assignments, and rules may or may not be what is best for one particular child. The best teachers try to individualize to a certain degree, but it's just not possible with typical classroom ratios to truly meet each student's personal needs and preferences. This is yet another reason why I think so many kids get burned out on school so early on. As an adult, I'm honestly not sure if I could function if someone told me what order I had to complete tasks in, where I had to sit, and even when I should eat and use the restroom all day long.... Yet that is exactly what we expect from children in traditional educational settings. At home, Munchkin chooses what order to complete his assignments in. When he needs a break, we take one. In the above photo, Munchkin was working on a "write the room" assignment in which he was supposed to locate and record something starting with each letter of the word PUMPKIN. Munchkin thought of our little pumpkin still on the vine outside and requested to go write outside so that he could use "pumpkin" for his first "P" word. So we went outside. After roaming the yard a bit and completing most of his words, he joined his little brother for playtime and then we all picked tomatoes and the pumpkin from the garden before going inside and resuming our normal "school" activities. I know at some point I may have to develop other guidelines or a stricter routine or schedule but so far we never have trouble completing our planned lessons. Sometimes we do "school" on weekday mornings and sometimes it is a Saturday evening, but because he is empowered and an active part of the process, Munchkin usually asks to do schoolwork, not the other way around.
This same principle seems even more important with my oh-so-independent little Monkey. Monkey has no interest in doing anything that is not his own inclination. As we are beginning to introduce tot-school activities, I am finding how important it is to give him control over the experience. The above photos were taken when I tried to introduce a transfer activity he had LOVED the day before. He clearly had no interest. Instead of pushing the activity, we tried another, which was a huge hit!
*** Most Importantly: They are only little once. I want to soak up every moment.***
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